More Than A Memory
by xXx A Little Fall of Rain xXx
Summary: AU; As Titanic sank into the deep pits of the ocean and those still on board were plunged into the icy cold waters two young lovers were separated. Jack Dawson is hauled onto a lifeboat while Rose DeWitt Bukater is lost in the dark alongside the other unfortunate souls. Will Jack be able to convinve Officer Lowe to go back for her, can he save her one last time? Or is it too late?
1. Aftermath

**Disclaimer; I do not own any of the characters or the italic'd song or the historical event, depressingly I don't own anything really... I'm just borrowing it all.**

**Authors Note; I've never written for this fandom before, I have always absolutely love Leo and Kate their chemistry was perfect in Titanic. Everytime I watch that film it totally breaks me (though it couldn't have ended any other way than it did, I don't mean the ship sinking but Jack dying, it had to happen) most of the time I just turn it off midway and pretend they all lived happily ever after so in that spirit I wrote a Jack lives ficlet.**

**Rated for some descriptions that 'delicate' people may find upseting, well that's if it's written well enough! **

**Really hope you enjoy, see you at the bottom.**

* * *

_Cold._

_So cold._

Jack Dawson's mind was shattered into a million pieces... all of them unable to comprehend anything other than the below temperatures jabbing at him like large swords running him through. For a moment he believed himself to be a child again, ice fishing with his father but he somehow knew it wasn't. This was so much worse.

Persistent hands began grasping at him.

The hands scrabbled and clutched at him once again, reaching deep below the freezing water and tightly grasped a hold of his shirt and dragged him upwards. His breath stuck in his throat he sputtered desperately as he attempted to suck in the air that felt like pure icicles. With a thud he felt his body land heavily on something wooden and hard, the brute force of it snapped his eyes open and several anxious faces loomed over him.

"He's alive!" one of them announced.

"Get him a blanket!" another ordered and within seconds a scratchy thick blanket was draped over his shivering form.

He wanted to speak. To scream. To cry. But he couldn't. His brain seemed to have ground to a complete halt. He didn't understand, what had happened? Where was he? What had led him here?

"Can you hear me sir?" a calming in control voice demanded and he forced his tongue out to lick his chapped lips before making his vocal chords answer.

"Yes."

"You're safe now!" the man promised and Jack blinked.

_Safe from what?_

_What was going on?_

And then like a sledgehammer hitting him repeatedly he remembered. The screams, the panic, the vertical angle at which Titanic had stood, the people who hadn't been able to hold on falling into the Arctic Ocean, him using his body to try and protect Rose and keep them from separating before the ship made its terrifying descent into the black inky sea below.

Rose?

Where was she?

Adrenaline hit his system and he bolted upwards staring around the near empty life boat and searched as best he could for Rose... even in the dark he could see she was not there. He would have been able to sense it if she were. Frantically Jack tried to fight off thoughts of the cold and focus in on when he had last seen her, the shrill ringing of the people screaming for their lives, the petrified looks on their faces as they attempted to cling onto life before falling down into the black ocean. And then with frightening speed they had sunk downwards, the vast ocean swallowing Titanic up greedily into her unchartered depths.

The force of hitting the water had jolted him backwards into the Arctic Ocean; the feel of it was like a million knives stabbing every part of his body. He had desperately tried to claw his way to the surface but something had caught onto his dungaree strap and started pulling him diagonally across the sea deeper and deeper into its murky pits. Somehow, just as his body was ready to give out whatever held on to him so tightly loosened and the release of weight sent his body racing upwards... and then came the hands... the persistent hands which had pulled him out.

But Rose... hadn't been pulled with him. They had been separated... oh god... she was still out there somewhere.

His heart stilled at the thought.

Straining his ears he tried as best he could to hear something... anything... but the eerie silence that met him caused his heart to ache. He wouldn't believe it... she wasn't gone, she was a fighter, a warrior, she wouldn't let go... not now they had found each other. He turned his eyes to the man at the helm of the boat while the other people eyed him warily.

"We have to go back." He said urgently.

"Don't be so absurd!" one of the other passengers protested but the Officer in charge shook his head.

"That was always the plan sir." The man stated and the passengers gasped; "You see that lifeboat over there? Not even half full, I intend to transfer you over to that boat and then return and search for survivors." He stated in a clear, no nonsense tone that Jack found very reassuring.

"I'll have you know Officer Lowe that I am a very well respected member of society I will not be carted around like some piece of luggage!" a woman said haughtily and the man glared at her.

"There are 1500 people out there;" he growled casting his index finger in the direction of the water; "I will not leave them to die alone so either you shift ship or you come with me and see what the lower classes of your society were left to." He spat vehemently and the woman stared at him shakily.

"We can't afford to waste more time." Jack murmured and the man nodded.

Together he and another passenger rowed the boat closer to one of the other life boats and very carefully managed to transfer 26 people onto the other boat. In return the other boat handed over several blankets and large coats as well as many devastated pleas that they try and save a family member or a loved one. It took a couple of minutes before Jack, another man by the name of William, a couple of other service men and their officer a Harold Lowe began to row towards the deathly quiet area where the magnificent but ill fated ship had faced her last moments.

"My brother and father are out there." William murmured quietly and Jack swallowed heavily.

"Concentrate;" Harold barked; "We'll have to take this very steady and slow, not a noise because if there are any survivors chances are then the only thing we'll hear is their breaths." He explained and both William and Jack narrowed their eyes in concentration as they approached the sickening sight of thousands of floating bodies.

Lowe's flashlight illuminated the lifejackets and enhanced the chalk white expressionless faces of those who perished this fateful night. Jack nearly did vomit when he noted several familiar faces... including Roses' maid Trudy... with every cell in him he forced himself to push them from his mind and focus on only one thing. Rose.

"Hello?" Lowe called; "Are there any survivors? Can anyone hear me?" he yelled... the silence that greeted them was utterly deafening.

XXXX

Rose DeWitt Bukater could no longer feel her limbs.

One by one they seemed to have shut down; the circulation of her body seemed to have slowed until it simply gave up. And for her part she was glad of it. Everyone around her was dead... the bodies that floated around her were enough to make her mad with grief... how had this happened? The fateful events of these past hours were sure to rock the world for many years to come; in fact she doubted they would ever forget what had happened to the 'unsinkable' Titanic.

A disgusted chuckle rumbled in her chest and though her exhausted insides were too weak to laugh her body shook. Her mind reflected back to that afternoon where Mr. Andrews and several others had insisted that the ship did not need lifeboats for everyone on board because she would never sink... and here they were.

Their arrogance had ended so many lives.

Jacks included.

When they had collided with the freezing water he had been torn clean from her, along with the rest of the victims she had splashed around and screamed his name, frantic to find the man who had saved her from every aspect of her life... she had scrambled onto a piece of the ship which was floating by and had used it as a platform to see from. The sight she saw she would never forget, hundreds, nay, thousands of people desperately paddling around like insects as they attempted to prolong their lives just a little longer.

That sight combined with no Jack had caused all the fight to flee her, she had slumped down tiredly on the wooden door raft that she was on and stared blankly up at the starless night sky willing for it to all be over.

Time dragged on for what felt like years... slowly the agonizing screams and frantic splashes and harsh breaths faded until the only noise to be heard was the soft lapping of the gentle water against bodies and debris.

Staring up at the vast open sky she found herself wishing to see a shooting star, something to wish upon... if she had just one wish it would be to see Jack one final time. To kiss him goodbye in this life so that she could go on to find him in the next... to think that only hours ago she had been in his arms made her feel irrationally angry at herself! Why hadn't she appreciated it more at the time, why she hadn't told him how much she already loved him, that he had changed her world for the better in so many ways, that he was her saviour?

"I love you Jack;" her hoarse voice whispered to the dark night air; "I'll find you, I promise, I won't let go." She croaked, her heart beginning to slow.

She didn't know how long she lay there, her mind slowly trailing over memories of him, the way he smiled, his scent, his kisses, the way he infused her life with colour and laughter and a joy that she had never known before. The funny thing was as her body succumbed to the cold her mind began playing tricks on her and she could swear she could hear his voice out there somewhere... lost in the black night. A faint smile ghosted onto her lips as she forced her voice to work one final time; _"Come Josephine on my flying machine going up she goes..."_

XXXX

"Easy does it sir." William said to the shivering man they had just rescued. Jack and Lowe piled blankets on top of him and kept him pressed between himself and William hoping to use what little body heat they owned to warm up this poor soul.

He was the fifth person they had pulled out so far.

5 out of 1500...

"I don't think we'll find anyone else." William murmured heartbrokenly; "We left it too long." He continued and Jack swallowed heavily at the realistic defeat this man's words housed. But he didn't allow them in, he wouldn't, Rose was out there, she had to be... he didn't allow her not to be.

"We need to keep looking." He said stubbornly and the older man sighed.

"Whoever you're looking for is probably dead son."

"I don't accept that."

"Look around you Jack... we're in a sea of bodies." William gulped, the devastation in his voice barely concealed – no doubt down to seeing his own family members floating lifelessly in the water. But for Jack it was a little too hard to hear and on impulse he shot upwards onto his feet causing the boat to rock dangerously.

"I am not going back without her!" he barked, an unhinged not lacing his voice barely noting the way in which the rest of the boat had tensed.

"Sit down Jack!" Lowe ordered but Jack's mind was spinning through everything that had just happened.

"You jump I jump, that's what we said to each other!" he told Lowe desperately, and though the fifth officer clearly had no idea what he was talking about he sent him a reassuring smile.

"I understand Jack and we'll look a little longer but if you don't sit down then you'll tip the boat over and we all die." He warned and Jack's legs gave out quite without consent and he sank down onto the wooden boat, William clasped his hand on Jack's shoulder in a paternal gesture and tears bit at his eyes.

He needed to find her. This couldn't be how it ended.

"Can anyone hear me?" Lowe called out again and Jack leaned forwards and with all of the strength and breath in him he screamed Rose's name.

"ROSE? CAN YOU HEAR ME? WHERE ARE YOU? ROSE!" he yelled over and over until Lowe leaned over and slapped him round the face before placing a finger over his lips gesturing for Jack to be quiet... the shock of being slapped made Jack comply.

"Do you hear that?" Lowe asked in a low voice and Jack strained his ears to listen... and then on the light breeze swirling around them he heard the sweetest thing in all his life;

"_...up she... goes..."_

"That's her." He breathed out, heart in his mouth, beating a mile a minute; "KEEP SINGING ROSE, WE'RE COMING!" he yelled as Lowe guided them closer to the source of the noise.

"_Come... Jo...se...phine... on... my... fly...ing... ma-machine... going... up...she.. goes... up... she... goes..." _the pained , quivering voice husked out quieter and quieter until only harsh breaths could be heard.

Jack snatched Lowe's light and shone it around the sea in a desperate way knowing that time wasn't on their side, every second mattered now... Rose was barely holding on. The ghostly white faces that stared back under the glare of the light was enough to turn his stomach but he didn't let himself be stopped, he continued waving the torch around until he saw a figure lying on what seemed to be a door frame... his heart damn near fell out of his chest when he saw that it was her.

"Over there!" he pointed and Lowe following the stream of light rowed them in her direction.

Her vibrant red locks were plastered to her head with thick icicles glistening proudly from them, her rosy complexion as pale as those lost in the water and her beautiful plump pink lips were quirked an ugly shade of blue.

It was almost as if he were looking at one of the lost.

"Careful son." William said gently as the boat pulled up alongside the doorway and Jack very gently and carefully took a hold of Rose by the waist, wincing as the biting cold water nipped at his skin and he lifted her out from the water.

The boat rocked as he pulled her over, Lowe reached over and grabbed her legs and manoeuvred them round so that she was fully inside the boat. Lowe then placed his hand on her neck and let out a satisfied noise that told them all that Rose was still breathing. Jack let out a strangled sob as he crushed her frozen shaking body into his, relief like nothing he had ever known flooded his system and he kept her tightly into his chest pressing hundreds of kisses onto her frozen stiff hair.

"I've got you Rose, you're safe now." He whispered into her hair as it kissed it once more, smiling gratefully at William who placed a blanket over the two of them, his eyes burning with emotion.

"Jack?" she managed to choke out and he pulled backwards slightly and stared into those mesmerizing stormy grey eyes of hers; "I'm c-cold..." she shivered and he wrapped the blanket around them a little tighter.

"I'm know... we're safe now... I'm here, and I'll never let you go again, do you hear me?" He murmured gently and she blinked up at him dazedly, clearly she didn't really understand what was happening right now, he doubted if she realized what was real and what wasn't; "We're safe... Rose, me and you, we're alright, we made it." He said over and over as he pulled her back into him and squeezed her shuddering form into his slightly warmer one.

Harold Lowe continued calling out into the dark night but there were no further responses, every one of them out there lost to their watery graves.

XXXX

She felt like she was floating.

Her mind disorientated and panicked. No matter how she tried she couldn't seem to get a hold of her thoughts.

Peeling her eyes open she winced at the brightness that greeted her and slammed them shut once more. There was a warmth in the air that should feel glorious on her skin and yet somehow it didn't... it seemed to hurt her... underneath her skin her blood felt like it was boiling in her veins while her cool body shivered and jerked at the chill it couldn't shake off. She could hear the distant rumble of conversation, bereft cries, small children sobbing for their fathers... but she was thankful to hear no more screams or that dreadful silence.

"_Take her down to the medical bay."_ A distant voice ordered, one that she had heard several times over the night. Were they talking about her?

"_What's wrong?"_ Jack's soothing voice asked and she longed to reach out and pull him in to her hold him close and never let go.

"_Try not to worry laddie, we just need to check her over."_ Another voice said, this one sounded even further away from her than before.

She tried desperately to call out to Jack, to listen to his calm reassuring voice, to tell him not to give up on her because she was still here but it was no use. Her body was too exhausted to obey and her chest was starting to ache in a way that made breathing painful.

"_I'm going too."_ Jack said firmly and she felt relief swill through her system that he wasn't going anywhere and then all of a sudden she was floating again.

XXXX

Nervous eyes searched the First Class deck of the Carpathia in hopes of catching sight of the man who she had entrusted her daughter too, when they had first met Caledon Hockley Ruth had believed her and Rose's troubles were over. The day he had proposed she had nearly sung she had been so happy, and by the time they had boarded Titanic she had genuinely believed that all of their hardships were over.

And then that boy had entered their lives.

Ruth honestly couldn't pinpoint when and where it had all changed but moments after her daughter had met that boy she had been lost to Ruth, to Cal, to the world that she was meant for. Fear that Rose would end up in a similar position she had after her husband died and left them in masses of debt had forced Ruth to try and bring Rose back to them but it was useless, she had too much of her father's reckless spirit in her. And it was that spirit that was ultimately her end.

Ruth was no fool, the second they had boarded the Carpathia she had spent the next hours roaming the boat in a frenzied state in the desperate hope that she would find her daughter. She didn't care what had happened before hand, Titanic sinking had swept away all of her pride, she only wanted her little girl back... but after a day of searching she realized there was a very small chance of that happening. Like so many others her daughter must have perished that night, but the uncertainty of never knowing would always haunt her... of that Ruth was sure.

"There was no sign of her." A low voice murmured and Ruth jumped slightly as she took in the broken sight of Caledon Hockley who too had spent a good deal of time looking for her daughter.

"And the boy?"

"Nope, neither names are on the survivors list either, I asked one of the men." He answered and Ruth felt her heart damn near snap in two.

"Oh god..." she breathed out in devastation, her face crumpled up and hot tears slipped down her cheeks while her chest shook with sobs unshed.

"I want you to know that even though Rose and I parted on bad terms;" he said and she frowned at him, to her knowledge he had borne Rose's improper behaviour the way any gentleman would, he had scolded when needed but he still treated her with respect and love; "I won't let that travel with me... in my mind she will always be the beautiful clever woman I proposed to in London." He stated voice thick with emotion and Ruth nodded.

"I'm glad."

"I also wish to tell you that just because Rose has passed that doesn't mean I will abandon you." He said and once again Ruth found herself completely thrown.

Surprisingly she hadn't even considered her own path from here on out, Rose's secured marriage would have secured her own future comfort as well... but now... now she was alone and to all sense and purpose she was penniless.

"You won't?" she asked and Cal shook his head.

"People may believe whatever they want but I loved your daughter and for her memory I will look after you." He vowed, his eyes glazed with an emotion that Ruth couldn't quite work out, was it bitterness or regret?

"Thank you Cal; I'm sure this kindness would have made her happy." She answered and he shrugged his shoulders, eyes still smouldering with that unknown emotion. But Ruth didn't have the heart or the patience to dwell on it too much; she was too full of gratitude for the man beside her and too full of grief at the loss of her beautiful, kind-hearted and foolish daughter.

XXXX

The heaviness lifted for mere moments, the warmth and softness of Rose's surroundings were entirely welcome, her body no longer ached, it just felt weary to the bone, a kind of weariness she had never experienced in her life. She heard a female voice in the distance humming and for a moment she wondered if it were Trudy... however, it soon came back to her and she wondered if Trudy had been among the lost, a thrill of determination ran through her and she needed to find out if her maid and friend was still alive.

Desperately she tried to open her eyes but her eyelids simply refused, she tried to sit up but her spine remained rigid, frustrated beyond belief she tried to move her hand to draw attention to herself but her limbs simply refused...There was no making them do anything. Clearly they were still in real need of rest, there was nothing to do but give in, she knew she was safe, she knew that Jack was with her... the questions and heartache could be saved for later when she was in a fit state for them.

Just as the fog closed in on her once again she felt a pair of lips press against her fingers and a smooth cheek lay itself against her hand. The owner of the hand – she knew to be Jack – let out a long sigh and his eyelashes fluttered against her... even in the darkness she knew that they were probably the luckiest people alive right now, not only had they survived but they had done so together.

XXXX

Jack Dawson had seen many things in his life, some had filled him with inspiration, others excitement some fear and horror... but never before had he ever experienced such helplessness as he felt right now. Relief had flooded him when they had finally caught sight of another vessel, for hours he had worried that they might had all be left out at sea... but when the Carpathia finally appeared he had foolishly believed all their worries to be over.

Once glance at the unconscious woman in his arms had corrected him.

Since they had pulled her from the water Rose had been in and out of consciousness and for a while he had believed it to just be exhaustion from everything they had been through, but the look on Lowe's face whenever he looked upon Rose or the other men they had rescued made him think otherwise... those suspicions had been confirmed when they had boarded the ship and it's crewmen had instantly insisted they go to the medical deck.

He had followed the crewmen down to the medical bay where they had instantly stripped Rose from her clothing and wrapped her up in blanket after blanket, he had suggested they bathe her in hot water or light the fire but instantly he had been rebuked, apparently that would kill her.

All they could do was wait for her fever to come down... and that was a case of if rather than when.

His worry had intensified when two of the men Officer Harold Lowe had saved from the water – before Rose – had died from hyperthermia... he had practically heard the thoughts of the medics after that; they believed it was only a matter of time before Rose's body gave out. After all she had been in the water longer than anyone else and since that brief conversation in the lifeboat she hadn't been conscious at all. And though Jack wanted to state he knew better, that the beautiful, proud woman before him was too stubborn to die a fear deep inside was slowly taking a-hold, paralysing the belief that such a thing might actually happen.

The longer she was out the harder his heart thumped against his ribs.

"Mr. Brown?" a voice from behind called and Jack spun around knowing that they were talking to him, when they had arrived aboard he had given false names for himself and Rose knowing that if Cal or Rose's tenacious mother knew of their survival then he would be parted from Rose with swift certainty.

"Yeah?" he asked and the young porter smiled.

"I bought you some soup." He said kindly and Jack smiled gratefully as he accepted the steaming bowl, the people and staff on the Carpathia had been amazingly kind to him, he supposed it was his avid devotion to the woman before him that had assured their sympathy and kindness not to mention everything he had lived through.

"Thank you."

"How's she this morning?" he asked and Jack sighed sadly.

"Still resting."

"And yourself?"

"Fine... just... tired of waiting you know?" he asked and the man returned a sigh before offering a small smile of reassurance.

"Have faith." Jack nodded his head not having the heart to tell the kind soul that he didn't have faith in anything right now... let alone in God.

"I will;" he lied before mustering up a smile for the man; "Thanks again for the soup." He said as he lifted the bowl and the man smiled sadly at him before scurrying away.

Not even bothering with a spoon Jack bought the bowl to his lips and gratefully drank it down, the warm liquid spreading through him sparked off a series of wonderful sensations of revival and comfort. Once he was down drew his chair a little closer to Rose's side and took her hand in his, absentmindedly he began playing with her fingers, linking them with his over and over, rubbing her palm and squeezing her hand gently before he bought it up and pressed several light kisses onto it.

"I don't know if you can hear me..." he trailed off uncertainly before shrugging; "But I need you to wake up soon... I need to look in those eyes of yours and see that my future is still here, that it didn't die that night... that I didn't lose it along with Fabrizio and everything else." He murmured against her pale hand.

Disappointment ran through him when nothing happened... a foolish part of him had hoped that she would burst to life after his speech but instead she remained still and at rest.

"You just take your time... I'll be here when you're ready." He promised as he pressed another kiss onto her hand before closing his eyes and leaning down using the side of her bed as a pillow. He squeezed his eyes shut and successfully blocked out the noises, faces and feelings that were threatening to overpower him... he couldn't lose it right now because if he did he doubted he would ever be able to pick himself back up again, instead he gave in to exhaustion and soon enough he was enveloped up in darkness as his body sucked up all of the sleep it craved.

XXXX

A strong ray of sunlight beamed down on her, even with her eyes closed its light managed to shine through illuminating the dreary blankness she had been locked in for god knows how long. Sucking in a deeper breath she forced her eyelids open, after mere seconds she had to close them again due to the brightness of it all, not letting that discourage her she pried her eyes open again and again each time managing to keep them open a fraction longer until her eyes were ready to take in their surroundings.

The steady hum of engines beneath her told her that she was on a boat, but it certainly wasn't the Titanic... where she was she didn't know but the noted two large coats draped over a small wooden chair by her bed and knew with certainty that Jack was near. Undoubtedly taking a break from watching over her, something she reckoned he had been doing ever since they arrived. Lord only knows when that had been; she had not an inkling of what time of day it was or even the date... to her it felt like no time had passed since she had been submerged into water and left to die.

Just like so many others. Only unlike her they hadn't been lucky enough to survive.

Slowly and carefully she manoeuvred herself into an upright position, wincing slightly at the pull on her aching muscles as she did. She bought her hands upwards and looked down at them surprised at how cut up and bruised they were... she didn't remember doing that but then again at the time of the sinking she had been utterly consumed with fear and adrenaline that she wouldn't have noticed even if she had hurt her hands.

The door to her small room slowly creaked open and she glanced over to see Jack making his way in, he looked as handsome as a dream, still clad in his art shirt and trousers held up by braces, his hair as shaggy and blonde like always and his eyes as beautiful and kind as they had been the first time she ever saw him. Green eyes locked with grey and his face broke into the widest smile, relief etched into every feature.

"You're awake!" he breathed as he raced to her side, cupped her cheeks and kissed her firmly on the lips. She smiled at the loving gesture and found herself feeling more grateful and more alive than she ever had knowing that they had each other forever.

"Oh Jack... I thought I'd never see you again." She told him her voice surprisingly hoarse from both disuse and the effect of the cold; "When I lost you in the water I felt like dying... and when I couldn't see you I nearly did." she told him, tears slowly trailing down her cheeks and he wiped them away tenderly before kissing her once again.

"Hey I don't wanna hear you talking like that alright?

"And then you came back for me..." she sniffled in disbelief and he tilted her face upwards and stared down at her lovingly.

"Of course I did. I told you, you jump I jump right? I wasn't going leave you out there." He said seriously and she leaned up and kissed him briefly before both of them lost themselves in silence as they tried to make sense of everything.

"How long have I been out?" she asked finally breaking the silence.

"A day and a half. You had me scared stiff." He chastised somewhat playfully and she smiled back.

"Where are we?"

"The Carpathia, she picked us up a few hours after we got you out of the ocean." He explained, his expression growing solemn almost instantly; "We're supposed to arrive in New York in a day and a half, may be a little longer." He said and she bit down on her bottom lip timidly.

"It really happened didn't it? Even now part of me wants to believe that it was just a horrible nightmare." She said, her eyes filling with unexpected tears and Jack settled down next to her on the small bed and took her in his arms, the comfort being in his embrace more than words could possibly describe.

"It happened." He replied grimly and she attempted to swallow the large ball of emotion in her throat.

"Do you know how many-"

"They reckon about 1500." He told her and she gasped, she knew there had been hundreds in the ocean but she never expected it to be that high. Her thoughts rushed to the people she knew and she looked up at Jack wide eyed, he seemed to understand her silent plea; "Your mom and Cal are up on the first class section they don't know we're here and I gave false names for us... no sign of Lovejoy I think we can guess his end... and Trudy too. There's rumour going around that Captain Smith and Mr. Andrews both went down with their ship... I'm sure there are a load of others you knew that died but... that's all I know at the moment..." He trailed off apologetically and she laced their fingers together, tears tumbling down freely.

"And what of your friends?" she asked tightly and Jack let out a anguished noise, not quite a sob very close to it.

"No sign of Cora or her family... Helga fell... and I can just feel Tommy and Fabrizio are gone." He told her, his eyes filled with so much pain it hurt her; "It's safe to say they're dead."

"Jack I'm so sorry." She whispered and he pressed a kiss onto her forehead.

"Yeah me too."

A heavy silence descended on them as they both allowed their mind to traipse over the vast amount of people they had met over the brief journey of Titanic, the people they had danced with, laughed with, shared stories with and befriended. So many of them were gone now, so much life wasted because a few arrogant people had placed their importance above that of mother natures... and was it those selfish few that paid the price? No, it was the likes of Helga, Trudy and Fabrizio who had never done anything wrong, who had simply gotten on a boat to make a better life for themselves... something they would never have now.

She wanted to scream at the injustice of it all but she was certain the world was screaming already... no screaming at those responsible wasn't the answer... instead she wanted to honour those that were lost... but how?

_How could they make all of those left behind proud? Was there anything that she could do?_

"What do we do now Jack?" she asked hesitantly, hoping that the artist beside her had a better clue than she and he let out a long sigh as held her a little tighter to him.

"We do what those poor souls can't, we go on, we make a life for ourselves, we make each day count and we _never_ forget them." He vowed and Rose nodded her head, she figured it was safe to say that the tragic story of the Titanic would live on for years to come, no one would ever forget least of all those who survived.

XXXX

**So I'm seriously freaking out about this, not sure I nailed it, like I said up top this is the first time I've attempted to write these characters and this horribly tragic events. Would really appreciate feedback, good, bad, ugly? Please let me know! **

**Now I am tempted to write a second chapter and turn this oneshot into a twoshot, but that's only if enough people are interested, so review or PM me and let me know!**

**Thanks for reading, and please review!**


	2. Letting Go

**Disclaimer; As stated in chapter 1 I own nothing and the quote in italics at the end of ****this chapter is lifted from the 1997 James Cameron movie.**

**A/N; Thank you to the lovely people who took the time to review, you're the reason there is a second and final chapter. **

**Smiles For Penguins - Thank you so much for being the first to review, I'm so glad you liked the last chapter and enjoyed the descriptions. Thanks again and I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**HystericalConfession - ****Thank you for your kind words and for the constructive criticism about my sentences being too long! I do have a habit of rambling and without properly editing my chapters they do tend to go on! I worked on this chapter so I hope it comes out better. Would love to know if it does. Thanks again for reviewing and I hope you like this next part.**

**SusanViktorija – Thanks for taking the time to review, means a lot that you're reading. Hope you like this next chapter!**

**13Sarah94 – Thank you for your review, I'm glad to know that people out there are reading. Really hope that this next part is to your liking.**

**This chapter kicks off a couple of years after the sinking when a memorial takes place. I attempted to convey the guilt, upset and grief that Jack and Rose would have gone through... not sure I nailed it. There are also a couple of familiar faces thrown in as well as a dash of fluff. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

_1__st__ March 1914._

Rose Dawson slowly opened her eyes, the room was gloriously warm and she was incredibly reluctant to get out of bed. It was just so darn comfortable and cosy she reckoned she could stay there forever. Snuggling deeper under her cover she trailed a hand down and rested it lightly on the small curve of her stomach and smiled fondly. Even now she still felt like it was all a dream... never would she have guessed that her life would turn out the way it had.

In fact 2 years ago she had been so lost, miserable and overwhelmed she had been ready to end her life. But that was in a time before she had known Jack, the man had changed her world in every single way a person could. She had been ready to die of unhappiness and then she boarded Titanic then suddenly he instilled her with hope and faith for the future - a faith that was soon tested with the sinking of the Titanic.

That night shook the whole world, millions of lives were affected and most would never be the same again.

A soft sigh slipped through her lips as that usual chill thrilled through her, the same chill she always felt whenever she thought back on that fateful night. Her mind drifted to when the Carpathia had docked in New York, she and Jack and sneaked off the boat and given their false names once again and made a break for it. It was then that she discovered the heart of the ocean hidden deep in her pocket, for a moment she thought it would solve all their problems.

But to sell it would highlight she was alive. So instead she kept it and hid and let the world believe that they died with all those other poor souls.

And in a sense it was true, physically they were both alive and well but something in them _had_ died that night. They became shells of their former selves. Rose hadn't been able to sleep properly for months, every time she closed her eyes she was on that door in the middle of the ocean surround by the dead or she was hanging from the ship like Helga before falling into the black sea. She had also found herself prone to bouts of irrational hysteria and bouts of severe depression, she just thanked god that she had Jack there to keep her together.

Jack had done a better job of masking his trauma from the world but there was a warmth lacking in him. In two years he never really spoke to her– or anyone– about that night it was clear that he was a haunted man. Over the months he had slowly regained himself until he was nearly himself again but even now, after 2 years he was still mourning that night... she was just fortunate that he was strong enough to keep himself together while forging their path forward.

After spending a couple of nights sleeping in several parks they had gotten enough money from the various charities organised for Titanic victims they headed towards Jack's hometown Chippewa Falls in Wisconsin. It was there they had stayed with his parent's friends for several weeks; and just liked promised he had taught her to do all of those things she dreamed of. They drank cheap beer, were horrendously ill on a rollercoaster, rode horseback – like men, chewed tobacco and not once had they eaten caviar.

She also learned a great deal about Jack Dawson, he talked to her about his parents, he showed her the lake he nearly drowned in, the house he'd grown up in, the school he went to... They talked about everything the past, the future, their hopes and dreams and ways they could accomplish them together. Rose had never had such a complete connection to another person in the world and while it was scary it was also kind of perfect.

That wasn't to say everything had been picnics and roses.

They had been penniless with no home, no friends, both of them haunted by the horror of the sinking and fear of what they were actually doing had caused problems. The first time they argued Rose felt certain she was going to murder him... really... the rage she felt inside had scared her! She was sure that Jack felt the same anger too as he had stormed out for hours... at first she had been glad to see the back of him but after three hours she worried that he wasn't coming back.

But when he came back she felt a relief like no other. They had quickly apologized and made love in the middle of the kitchen.

Not long after that they moved to New York (where they settled down and bought a tiny apartment where they still lived), Jack had found success as an artist while Rose got a job as an evening singer, her rendition of 'Come Josephine' was the talk of the town for a while. After only weeks Jack's talent was spotted and he became a real name in the art industry, at first they worried that Cal or her mother might hear of 'Jack Dawson' and come track them down but after months of nothing she relaxed.

He had finally asked her to marry him three months back, she knew they had been the talk of their social scene, living together but unwed! What scandal! But when people learned of their story they were always a good deal more sympathetic. Their wedding had been tiny, only a couple of very close friends attended and Jack's aunt and uncle had been witnesses, it was exactly what she wanted.

And once they were married the good news just kept coming.

Last month just as their offer for their perfect house had gone through she had made the wonderful discovery that she was pregnant... at first she had worried that Jack wouldn't want a child but she had nothing to worry about. He had laughed joyously and scooped her into his arms and twirled her around and around until they were both dizzy.

The bang of the door swinging open and closed bought Rose from her reverie and she waited expectantly for her husband to come through. Within seconds he entered the room but there was something off about him, he smiled at her lovingly before walking forwards and kissing her on the brow.

"Morning Mrs. Dawson." He said softly and she caught his hand in hers and made him sit down beside her.

"What's wrong?" she asked and he quirked an eyebrow at her.

"How did you know something was up?"

"You're squinting." She said and he sighed placing his hand over her barely there bump absentmindedly; "Tell me." She insisted gently and he nodded before handing her a newspaper, she glanced down at the headline and felt her stomach twist.

'_Memorial for those lost on R.M.S Titanic to be held on 10__th__ April, Southampton, England.'_

Rose read over the short article amazed that even though the memorial was taking place in England American newspapers were printing it. She supposed it was because Titanic's sinking had made the media a lot of money, it probably always would. Next to the by-line stood a grainy black and white photograph of the doomed ship itself and she felt a shiver run through her just looking at it again... even now she found it hard to believe the unsinkable ship was at the bottom of the Atlantic.

"I want to go." Jack said slowly, breaking Rose from her gaze and she blinked at him, she could see the pain still locked away in his eyes and it was clear that something had sparked such a renewed interest in the ship and she nodded.

"We'll go then."

"You don't have to if you don't want to... I know how hard it is... I don't want your night terrors to start again." He murmured but she waved her hand dismissively.

"Jack, we'll face this how we lived through it; together." She stated in a tone that brokered no argument and he smiled at her, his eyes still distracted. Unable to bear the lost look on his face she scooted back slightly and lifted the cover, wordlessly ordering him back into bed. Once he was lying next to her she stared up at him wide eyed.

"What?" he whispered.

"What's gotten you like this; it's not like you to be melancholic." She answered just as quietly and he sighed, absently running his fingers through her hair.

"I still-"

"What?" she prompted when he went quiet.

"Feel guilty. My best friend died on that ship and the only reason he was on that boat was me winning the tickets in a hand of poker." He told her and she stared at him incredulously. Never in two years had he voiced that he felt this way, to hear him say he thought he was responsible for Fabrizio's tragic death was unfathomable.

"Jack that wasn't your fault! There was no way you could have known Titanic was going to sink! There was nothing you could have done..."

"I know but, he was there because of me."

"You may have gotten him on the boat but think back on how Fabrizio was. Do you honestly think anything would have stopped him from going to America?" she asked and a small reluctant chuckle slipped through the artists lips as memories of his friend came to him; "It was his choice to go with you and nobody's fault that the iceberg hit us. But if you want to blame someone? Blame the people who thought it was acceptable not to put enough lifeboats on board, blame the people who ordered the gates locked so that the lower classes fates were sealed, blame the iceberg, blame the arrogance of man... but do not blame yourself!" she ordered and he sighed heavily before bringing her tight into him.

"I love you." He murmured into her hair and she smiled.

"I love you too... and when we get to Southampton you'll be able to say a proper goodbye to Fabrizio. And we'll honour all those others who were lost that night." She told him gently and he nodded his head.

"You know... as guilty as I feel about Fabrizio, winning that hand in poker was the best thing that's ever happened to me." He said as he rested his forehead against hers and she frowned at him wondering how winning a place on Titanic could possibly be the best thing that had ever happened to anyone.

"Why?"

"Because it led me to you." He said simply before bringing their lips together once more preventing all further talk as he proceeded to show her just how much he loved her.

XXXX

The cold English air whipped around his face and Jack shivered, he'd forgotten how chilly England could be. Wrapping an arm around Rose he bought her a little closer to him as they walked down the busy streets of Southampton. It amazed him to see that the town had barely changed since he was last here, he didn't know exactly what he was expecting to see but he had changed so much in two years he supposed he was expecting to see it reflected in the town.

They had arrived a couple of days ago, the journey – though peaceful as it had been - had been very difficult for them both. Hardly surprising as it was the first time since they had boarded a sea vessel since the Titanic (not counting the Carpathia). Rose had held up the guards for nearly a whole hour while checking in, making sure that there were enough lifeboats for all passengers while he had focussed on trying to keep his imagination and fears from taking over.

The first night they had barely slept a wink, both curled up in each other's arms, both bundled up in their lifejackets, watchful for any unprecedented movement of the ship. The 2nd and 3rd nights hadn't been much better. In total it had taken 7 days to get from New York to Southampton and he had never been so relieved to be back on dry land.

A child's joyful screams bought Jack back to his surroundings and he let out a long sigh. He looked around the cobbled streets wonderingly, although they docked days back this was the first time he had stepped foot on this actual street. This time two years ago he and his best friend were boarding the ship of dreams, they had no idea of the people they would meet or the impact they would have on their lives... even now he could remember them all, so happy, so untouchable, so filled with hope that with arrival in New York all of their lucks would change.

None of them to know that the ship (and themselves) wouldn't make through the week.

"Jack?" Rose called worriedly and Jack looked at his beautiful wife and smiled softly, his eyes landed on a building over her head and with a surprised gasp he wandered towards it.

"Oh my god." He breathed in shock.

"What is it?" she asked her own eyes appraising the dimly lit, run down bar and he smiled.

"This is where I won the tickets... exactly 5 minutes before Titanic sailed."

A smile lit his lips as he got caught up in reminiscing. It was like he was somehow watching his past self place down a winning hand and hug his gleefully dancing best friend before the barman told them that Titanic was about to sail. He took a hold of Rose's hand and turned to look down the street;

"The barmen told us Titanic was leaving and we grabbed our stuff and ran down here;" he explained as his feet hurried along the pavement bringing Rose with him. He stared at the crowded dockyard and pushed towards the front, his mind reliving the past; "Straight up to the ship and I convinced the officer that we were both Americans and he let us on..."

He could still feel the joy of running down those hallways, elated feeling like the luckiest son of a bitch alive.

"We hurried up onto the top deck;" he said gently, even now he could feel what it was like to be up so high. He could feel the breeze on his neck, hear the cheers and shouts from all around him, taste the salt air in his mouth. He had felt like a king, invincible; "And even though we didn't know anyone in the crowd waving we shouted goodbye anyway. I suppose it's only fitting that it's here I say goodbye again." He whispered and Rose linked their fingers and squeezed his comfortingly.

"I'll give you a minute." She whispered somehow knowing that he needed to do this alone.

He gave her a grateful smile as she moved backwards and was almost instantly swallowed up by the crowd. The whole dock awash with relatives and other survivors from the ship... but the mood was very different to how it had been 2 years ago; this time there was no excitement only grief and a sense of finality and reluctant acceptance that their loved ones were gone.

"Do you want a flower?" a little voice asked interrupting his thoughts and Jack glanced down to see a pretty little brunette girl, aged around 5 years old staring up at him with an expectant look on her face. She somehow looked incredibly familiar to him but he couldn't place her; "Well?" she persisted and he smiled.

"A flower?" he asked and she nodded.

"To throw in the water, me and my auntie grew lots of them because my mummy, daddy and sister died on that boat." She told him simply and he felt his heart clench for her, to have lived through such a loss so young was heartbreaking, but then at her age she probably didn't remember much; "I was assposed to go too but I was very little then and I got poorly so I had to stay behind. My auntie was going to take me to New York when I was better but when the ship sank I had to stay with her." She rambled quickly.

"And you bought the flowers as a memorial?" he asked and the girl nodded.

"Yes, we grew them... but I'll let you have some because you look very sad too." She said as she passed up three yellow flowers and he smiled.

He held up the flowers, closed his eyes and pressed a kiss onto the petals of them before throwing them into the sea before him; he took a hold of Fabrizio's image. This wasn't him letting go of his friend but letting go of the guilt he carried around with him, a guilt that he knew Fabrizio wouldn't want him to have. In his head Jack vowed never to forget him and that he hoped to make his best friend proud, to honour his memory until his own dying day.

"Thank you."

"That's alright." She said with a kind smile; "Are you feeling very sad still?" she asked and he nodded his head.

"A little."

"Do you want to know what my auntie told me when I was very sad because I missed mummy?" she asked with bright eyes and he nodded.

"If you don't mind telling me."

"She said that the boat they were on is still sailing. But not on the water, now it goes across the night sky going from star to star;" she told him, her eyes widening at the idea; "And that everyone who was on it that didn't come home are safe and happy. And one day I'll get to go and be with them... but not for a long time yet." She said with a waggle of her little index finger and he smiled softly.

As ridiculous as it sounded the idea of the Titanic sailing through the night sky with everyone on board gave him a weird sense of comfort. He knew that it was a story told to a child who couldn't understand but to him... to think of his friends all vibrantly alive, all still abroad that wonderful vessel gave him a kind of peace. A peace he thought to have lost with the ship.

"Thank you." He said gratefully and she grinned at him.

"No prob-" her voice cut off as another voice yelled out.

"CLARA CARTMELL!" the voice cried and the little girl beamed and bounced on the spot while Jack felt as though he could have been knocked down with a feather... could this little girl really be Cora's little sister?

Of course they looked alike and had the last name and this little girl had lost her mother, father and sister but... it seemed completely impossible. But at the same time it felt wonderful to believe that there was still a little of that beautiful child and her kind hearted family still on earth.

"Here auntie!" she cried breaking his thoughts, she gave him a stunning smile before dashing away leaving him stood there utterly stunned as he watched the little girl be scooped up by a man who looked like a fairer haired Bert before they disappeared into the crowd.

"Jack?" Rose called and he looked over to where she was, radiant as ever and smiled widely at her. He stretched out his hand to her and stepped towards him a loving look on her face; "Are you alright?" she asked and he nodded his head feeling a lightness in his chest he'd not felt for a long time.

"Yeah, I think I finally am." He promised as he pulled her close to him and stared into those arresting green eyes of hers and felt himself catch his breath. He really had ended up as the luckiest son of a bitch on earth; "Thank you for coming with me."

"There was no way I wasn't coming Jack. I was there too... and in any case, you jump I jump right?" she asked and he nodded his head, a serious look on his face, the one he always got when he drew, the one that never failed to make Rose giggle.

"Always."

"Are you ready to leave?" she asked the double meaning in her words not lost on him. She wasn't just asking if he was ready to leave the docks but if he was ready to move on from Titanic, it would always be there, they would always be haunted by it but for the first time he felt like it was time to place it behind him and look to the future.

"Yeah, I am." He said, and with one final look to Southampton dockyard he took a hold of the woman he loved by the hand and led them away, towards their future.

XXXX

"And you're certain everything is alright?" Rose pestered as they walked away from the dockyard, there was a glimmer in her husband's eyes that told her something major had shifted within him. He now had the same spirit in his eyes that he did the night they met. That endless optimism and easiness had been tainted after the ship sunk but now she was being bathed in its warmth once again it was completely overwhelming and wonderful.

"Rose." He groaned and she huffed.

"I feel like you're not telling me something!" she complained and he laughed.

"Fine you caught me, I've met someone else and I'm leaving you." He teased and she rolled her eyes at him and slugged him on the shoulder.

"OW!" he whined and she stared pointedly at him; "Jeez that really hurt." He mumbled as he rubbed the spot on his shoulder and she rolled her eyes.

"Well that's what you get for teasing the mother of your child." She told him haughtily before walking past him, he let out a laugh as he went to grab her but she shrugged him off.

"Hey c'mere!" called but she carried on walking and the next thing she knew he had chased after her and whipped her off her feet before pulling her tight to him, her back pressed flush against his chest; "Where do you think you're going huh?" he teased and she wriggled her body in an attempt to get away.

"Let go of me Jack!" she squealed and he spun her around so that he could look down into her eyes. The expression on his face now intensely passionate and she bit down on her bottom lip.

"Never." He vowed and she smiled at him.

"So you don't have a mistress then?" she asked with a twinkle in her eye and he groaned.

"Do you even need to ask me that?"

"Then what's your secret?" she pestered.

"You're a nightmare Rose Dawson... I just, I feel like I can finally put him to rest." He told her seriously and she smiled at him, understanding, compassion and love etched into every part of her face. She honestly felt relief that he was finally letting himself find peace with that tragic night.

Standing up on her tip toes she pressed a kiss onto his lips while wrapping her arms around his neck, he in turn placed his hands over her hips while smiling against her mouth. Her hands trailed down his neck and came rest against his heart which thudded in a reassuring way beneath her fingertips. She supposed to some people it may seem silly that feeling his heart beating filled her with a belief that the world was a good place. That miracles did happen... and Jack Dawson had been her very own miracle.

"..._se_!" a far off female voice screamed and she pulled back from Jack's kiss with a confused look on her face, one that his own features mirrored; "_ROSE_!" it called again and she looked around the dockyard curiously.

"Did you hear that?"

"Yeah..."

"Where's it coming from?" she asked as she continued scanning the crowd for whoever was calling to her and then she saw the woman and her heart nearly stopped.

"Mother?" she whispered in awe as the immaculately dressed Ruth DeWitt Bukater rushed towards them, her face the very picture of shock, disbelief and confusion.

With each step closer her mother took Rose could see that the past two years hadn't been kind to her. Her red hair was considerably greyer, her face while still proud and beautiful looked haggard and tired and her eyes which were slowly brightening at the sight of her were filled with grief. Behind Ruth trailed a man that Rose had never seen before and she wondered briefly if her mother had remarried.

"Oh my lord;" Ruth breathed, her voice cracking slightly; "It is you." She said bringing her hands over her mouth before hurrying even closer and for a moment Rose flinched thinking that her mother meant to hit her but all of a sudden frail arms gathered her up in a tight embrace; "My daughter." She whispered and Rose felt unexpected tears prick at her eyes.

"Hello mother." She answered softly as she held her back a mixture of feelings crossing through her.

"Let me look at you." Ruth said as she stepped backwards and appraised her daughter; "You look wonderful... and you're pregnant too!" she gasped, overwhelmed with joy as she took in the curve of Rose's stomach.

"Four months now." She answered softly and Ruth shook her head in wonderment.

"I still don't understand how you're here... I thought you were dead... I was sure you went down with the ship!" Ruth murmured.

"I did." she turned her head to look at Jack who smiled softly at her; "We both did." she answered and Ruth blinked at them.

"Then how-?"

"Why don't we have this conversation somewhere we can sit and talk properly?" Jack suggested and Rose nodded at him.

Just as he was about to lead them towards the cafe Ruth placed a hand on his arm and Rose watched on worriedly, her mother had never cared for Jack, ever. She wondered if her mother's mind had changed in light of everything that happened.

"I never liked you Mr. Dawson. When I first met you I thought you were trouble. That you were going to ruin my daughter." Ruth said slowly and Jack quirked his eyebrow; "But I was wrong, you're good for her. And you've looked after her better than I ever could." Jack gave her a surprised yet sincere smile in response.

"Thanks, I think. Now, shall we?" he asked as he headed towards the cafe and Rose followed on feeling a little bit like she was walking on a cloud. This whole scenario felt like a dream and even though she didn't know how it was going to play out she knew that despite the odds she was happy to see her mother again.

* * *

"I want to know everything." Ruth said as she sipped tea out of a china mug and Rose felt Jack take her hand and squeeze it and she sighed; "You said you went down with the ship?" Ruth questioned and Rose nodded before glancing at Jack in a pleading way, not trusting her own voice to convey what happened that night.

She had come to terms with what happened, grieved for it even... but the idea of talking about it, reliving it felt scarier than words could describe.

"We were separated in the water;" Jack explained and Rose froze reliving hitting the water and realizing that Jack wasn't with her... that fear had crippled her; "Part of the ship caught onto me and dragged me along the ocean and as luck would have it I landed right by one of the lifeboats." He paused for a moment before a haunted look appeared on his face; "They pulled me out and then I realized Rose wasn't with me-"

"You went back for my daughter?" Ruth finished and Jack nodded.

"Well I wasn't going to leave her behind now was I?" he asked rhetorically, and though there was no snub intended in his words Ruth flinched as that was exactly what she had done.

"He pulled me from the water and when we reached the Carpathia I was taken to the medical deck. Jack gave them false names for us both." She answered and her mother sighed, comprehension flickering in her eyes.

"That's why we never found you."

"You looked?" Rose asked in surprise and Ruth nodded her head.

"I spent the whole first day searching for you, the only place I wasn't allowed into was the medical deck and I begged for the names but yours were never mentioned so I didn't think you were alive... and Cal? Well he didn't stop searching until we reached New York. And even then he didn't stop." She said and Rose shivered at the mention of her ex-fiancés name.

"I guess he didn't like losing one of his possessions."

"He did care for you Rose. In your memory he offered to look after me when we got to New York. He gave me an allowance and a place to live, he took care of everything up until I met John." Ruth explained and Rose glanced over at the thickset man who had followed her mother out of the crowd, she was partly surprised at her mother's choice of new husband but there was something very calming and kind about John Newton. She guessed her mother needed that kind of stability after everything she had lived through these past years.

"I'm glad you found that mother." She said honestly.

"I still can't believe you're here." She murmured and Rose looked over at Jack feeling a little uncertain but one look at her husband and she was filled with confidence that she had made the right choices.

"I'm sorry I let you think I was dead;" she told her mother truthfully, the idea of her own child doing something like that to her was crushing so she couldn't imagine how Ruth must have felt; "But I knew if you found me then you would have fought for what you thought was best for me... but I needed to go with him. He was-is what's best for me." She said passionately and Ruth nodded her head slowly.

"I'm starting to see that."

"Jack saved me in every way a person can be saved." Rose admitted truthfully and she glanced shyly over at her husband who lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it briefly; "He's everything I need and you didn't understand that. But nonetheless I am sorry for any suffering that my decisions caused, that was never the intention."

"I just... need to know, were you ever going to tell me you were alive? Or would you have let me believe that you were dead until I died?" Ruth asked and she sighed heavily, truth be told she hadn't ever planned on revealing herself. Her mother had always been a complication when it came to Jack and Rose had loved living her own life without drama.

"Maybe one day I would have..." she said and it was true, of this moment that was really the best she could offer her mother right now and Ruth nodded.

A strange air of finality hung between the two of them and somehow both Ruth and Rose knew this was the last time they would ever see one another. Too much had changed between them to ever regain that former closeness they once had and what's more was Rose knew without a doubt she didn't want to. She wanted to go on living as Rose Dawson and all the freedom that came with it, it was sad but really there was no place for Ruth in her world any longer. They had simply moved on.

"I'm glad you're happy Rose." Ruth said breaking the silence and she nodded.

"I am."

"And I suppose you'll be going back to New York soon?" she asked and Rose nodded.

"Jack's work has been recognized and galleries are buying his art. With the extra money we've been able to buy a house which I'm hoping we'll be able to sort out in time for this little one's arrival." She explained excitedly as she rubbed her stomach fondly.

"That's wonderful." Ruth said and she nodded her head and tilted it to the side.

"Maybe one day when everything is settled you could come visit us." She offered kindly – though deep down she knew it would never happen.

"I'd love that." Her mother answered with a loving smile before slowly rising from her seat, her silent husband following suit; "Goodbye Mr. Dawson... keep up the good work." She said as she extended her hand and Jack stood hastily tipping his chair over in the process, he took her mother's hand and shook it, a look of understanding between them.

It was like Ruth was handing Jack over sole custardy of her daughter, trusting him to look after her and keep her safe and happy for the rest of his days.

"I will." He promised.

"I know." She said before turning to Rose, who herself stood upwards and walked into her mother's embrace and gave her a huge hug; both knew that it meant goodbye. Even though it was the right thing to do Rose found herself feeling unexpectedly torn up inside, tears burned in her eyes and she clutched onto the woman who had bought her up tightly.

"I love you." She whispered impulsively into the greying red hair and she heard her mother chuckle.

"I love you too." Ruth pulled back and surveyed her closely and Rose felt a lump catch in her throat; "Take care my beautiful daughter." She whispered before turning round abruptly – Rose supposed in an attempt to keep her dignity about her - and heading out of the cafe with John hot on her heels.

The red woman beauty managed to keep it together until Jack wrapped his arms around her and then she crumbled.

She buried her head in his chest while her shoulders shook with sobs. She couldn't understand it, she hadn't seen the woman in years, she hadn't even thought about her! Without her life had moved on joyously and yet something in saying goodbye triggered overwhelming feelings of loss and neglect. What kind of person could abandon their own mother? _Her apparently. _The thought made her cry a little louder, her heart shunning all reason in favour of utter despair.

"Hey Rose look at me." Jack insisted and she managed to focus in on her husband's concerned face; "I know you're hurting but you did the right thing... I need you to calm down... take deep breaths for me." He ordered gently and she attempted to try and copy Jack's calm rhythmic breaths.

"I'm sorry... I don't know where this is coming from." She said breathlessly and Jack chuckled as he sat down pulling her into his lap.

"It's coming from a goodbye to the past;" he told her soothingly as he tucked some of her unruly hair behind her ear; "Now it's time to look to the future, to our new house, our baby." He rubbed his palm over her stomach. A smile flitted onto her lips as his words wove magic inside her mind.

"Do you want a boy or a girl?" she whispered and he shrugged.

"I don't mind, as long as the little one is healthy." He told her honestly, the flash in his eyes showing just how excited he was; "How about you? Any preference?" he asked and she nodded her head slowly, a smile in her eyes.

"I'd like a little boy, exactly like his father in every way. So that one day he can meet a young lady who needs rescuing and save her." She said honestly and he grinned before cupping her cheeks and pulling her lips down to his erasing any feelings of doubt or worry from her system.

Saying goodbye to the past was never easy, but Rose Dawson was absolutely certain that this was where she belonged, with Jack and their family in New York.

XXXX

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock._

Jacks eyes snapped open; it took roughly three seconds to work out what had jolted him from his slumber and when he realized he felt his stomach drop. They were on the Mauritania travelling back to New York, it had to be pretty late in the evening as both he and Rose had fallen asleep. And yet there was insistent tapping on the door to their cabin and Jack feared that the boat had struck an iceberg and the vessel was soon to sink.

_Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock._

Rushing out of bed he hurried towards the door desperate to find out what was going on, his heart racing frantically in his chest he ripped open the door he saw one of the crew stood there quite calm and unbothered.

"What's wrong? What's going on? Are we sinking?" he demanded and the man blinked in astonishment and slowly shook his head.

"No sir... I'm here to inform Mrs. Dawson that we are approaching where-"

"Thank you." Rose's voice sounded out behind them and Jack spun round and stared at his wife who was calmly putting her coat on; "Jack, you may want to put something warmer on, it's cold out there." She told him cryptically and he frowned at her utterly lost at what was happening.

"Rose what's going on?" he asked and she smiled.

"We have to hurry or we'll miss it." She warned and he obediently took the coat in her outstretched hands and followed her out of their rooms, down the corridor and out on deck. As she had predicted the air was beyond freezing and he wrapped the coat around him a little tighter as he followed her towards the bow of the ship.

Relief poured off of him in waves as his mind fully accepted that the ship was in no trouble, that they were sailing on calm, clear seas... there was no panic, no screaming and no flooding. The further on they walked the looser his throat became and the slower his heart thumped, that unspoken – possibly irrational – fear slowly fading. In its place grew an impatient curiosity as to what his wife was up to.

"I don't understand, what are we doing out here?" he asked and she sighed before sending him a pointed look as if to tell him to '_shut up'_ that she would tell him in a moment.

Taking the hint he grew quiet and she took his hand as they walked to the very end of the ship, his breath caught in his throat at the beautiful star filled sky and he sighed in wonderment. Looking at such enormity always bought a feeling of being suitably small in comparison to the vast world around him. Rose's pace slowed as they reached the railings and she turned round to face him, a rather poignant expression on her face, he knew that whatever she had bought them here to do would mean a lot to both of them.

"When we boarded the ship I asked the master at arms to have one of his men inform me when we reached this point." She told him seriously and he frowned, still not joining the dots; "All we had to work with really was the days into the journey and the time so... I'm not sure if it's this spot exactly but it's close enough She murmured and Jack blinked.

"Where are we?"

"Two years ago today Titanic hit an iceberg and she sank somewhere around here." She told him and he felt as though someone had kicked him in the stomach, the breath literally snatched from him.

He looked around at the black night around him unable to believe that such a tragedy could have taken place somewhere that was now as peaceful as a church. He walked towards the railings and peered over the edge amazed that underneath them, at the very bottom of the sea lay the very boat herself and inside her and all around them were the lost... those that weren't lucky enough to have survived that night.

"It seems unbelievable..." he murmured; "It's so calm now." he closed his eyes and inhaled an icy lungful of air and for a fraction of a moment he could swear he heard the screams, opening his eyes again to the silent night he shook his head.

"I thought we could pay one final tribute." Rose said quietly and he looked over at her.

"How?"

Instead of answering him Rose reached deep into her pockets and pulled out the '_Heart Of The Ocean_', even in the darkness of night its beauty managed to shine and glisten, it was truly a sight to behold... he looked up to Rose's face and they shared a smile of understanding. This necklace symbolised that doomed ship and all those lost with it. To him it seemed only fitting that the heart of the ocean should travel down and lay alongside what would be an integral part of maritime history.

"Together." She whispered and he pulled her into him so that she was resting between his body and the cool railings, it was funny that yet another meaningful moment in their relationship was taking place at the bow of a ship.

Jack curled his fingers around her hand and together they placed their arms over the railing, the inky dark sea beneath them looking as inviting and deceitfully dangerous as ever. He rested his head on her shoulder and kissed the exposed skin of her neck lovingly before letting out a sigh, he bought her hand in closer to her chest and then with as much force as they could muster the shot their arms out and released their grip on the jewel.

Mesmerized they both watched as the silver and blue stones seemed to dance on the air for minutes before gravity pulled her down. Once it hit the ocean it seemed to swirl around and around twinkling beautifully as it sank deeper into the murky depths towards the ship of dreams. Tears of love and loss glossed over both of their eyes as the necklace disappeared. It somehow felt like they were both giving something back, a way of commemorating the lost.

He wasn't entirely sure how long they had spent wrapped up in each other's arms staring out at the ocean ahead. Both of them soaking up the feelings and memories – good and bad – of that voyage which had changed them both so much, that had shaped their future in ways they would never have imagined. He bought her even closer to him and placed his hands over the curve of her stomach, her hands rested on top of his and he entwined their fingers together.

"You want to know what a little girl whose family died on Titanic told me?" he asked and Rose turned her head to look at him reminding Jack of their first kiss.

"Tell me." She prompted and he smiled as little Clara Cartmell's words spun round in his head.

"She said that the ship is now sailing in the night sky, travelling from star to star." He told her and they both found themselves staring up at the vast universe above; "And every one who died that night is still on board... safe and happy... and I can picture it." He admitted softly and Rose smiled.

"It's a wonderful image."

"I'm drawn to it Rose... something in me wants to put this image down on paper." He whispered honestly.

"A little different from your usual work." She commented mildly but there was nothing but support in her tone.

"I know... and a part of me is very quick to point that out... but my gut is saying I need to do this. And the last time my gut spoke to me this loudly was the first time I saw you." He stated simply and Rose couldn't help but smile at the memory.

"I remember seeing you staring at me and I thought for a poor guy you looked very well indeed." She teased and he chuckled lightly.

"Well I remember thinking that this woman is going to play a big part in my life... that's if I get the chance to meet her." He said seriously and she rolled her eyes.

"You did not."

"I'm serious I did!" he insisted, he could remember the way his heart thumped in chest at the sight of her. Something deep within had just known that he and this upper class dame were somehow destined to share something together; "If I hadn't have been so sure of it then I wouldn't have chased you the way I did." he vowed and she turned her head so that she could look into his eyes.

"Well I'm glad you caught me." She said honestly, her eyes sparkling.

"I'll always catch you Rose Dawson, and I'm never going to let go." He promised and she leaned in and pressed a loving kiss onto his lips in reminiscent of the first kiss he and Rose had shared. Back then he could have had no way of knowing just how blessed his life was going to be. Even now he had trouble believing that he had gotten the girl, survived the greatest disaster in maritime history to date and was making a name for himself in the art world!

It felt almost too good to be true, but fortunately for the Dawson family luck seemed to be on their side as did the talent for making everyday count.

* * *

Jack did go onto draw his (and Clara's) vision of life after Titanic. Before he started he published an article in the New York Times which had soon gone global asking for any and all people who had lost someone on the ship to send him a likeness of their lost ones. He had been overwhelmed with the amount of responses but soon enough he had enough faces to draw. In his head he pictured them all in front of the great staircase, he placed as many of the people in the piece as possible and called it '_The Heart of the Ocean'_ its reception had been more than Jack could have ever expected and it had turned him into a household name.

It became his most famous work. People from all over the world flocked in to see it, even after Jack's death. After a century of living in a small gallery in New York it had been moved to a museum in Southampton dedicated to Titanic where it still hangs today.

Rose Dawson herself had several brushes with fame but so wild was her spirit that she never settled in one occupation for long, she became one of the first women to ever fly a plane, she had worked in several silent movie pictures and had even been approached by Hollywood to sign! But by the time they had offered she had moved on to the next great adventure of her life. Towards the end of her life she documented it all in an autobiography which had become a bestseller due to her wonderful and numerous careers, her husband, her family and her voyage and vivid memory of the Titanic.

Their first child Thomas Andrew Dawson was born in the summer time; he was followed by three more siblings Cora Ruth Dawson, Molly Helga Dawson and their finally Jack Fabrizio Dawson. All of whom went on to lead full and interesting lives – too varied and impressive to properly list here.

Ruth Newton nee DeWitt Bukater died shortly after seeing her daughter in 1914, she never made it to New York to see her daughter flourish but knowing that her child outlived her had been enough to make her happy.

Much to Rose's surprise John Newton had kept in touch with them... but after being called up to fight in the Great War his correspondence ceased.

Caledon Nathan Hockley had battled with himself for years. As Jack's star began rising he had wanted to go back and punish the gutter-rat for seemingly sailing through life but he never had. He had remarried and had children but the Wall Street Crash hit him hard and he ended up eating a pistol.

Rose and Jack had spent many years filled with joy, anger, tears and laughter together, at a ripe old age of 100 Jack had passed away and Rose followed him barely a year afterwards. As their spirits left this life they morphed into their younger selves and travelled up to that boat in the sky where they met by the clock on grand staircase. There they had found old friends, rejoiced, wept and celebrated with those they had never thought to see again... what better way to continue their journey than to go back to the beginning, to the very place their dreams were foundered.

"_Titanic was called the Ship of Dreams and it was. It really was."_

XXXX

**So I really hope that ****you enjoyed this chapter, would love some feedback as to what you thought. It would be the perfect way for me to round off this little story. **

**Thanks for stopping by and please review!**


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